James Urbaniak ([info]urbaniak) wrote,
@ 2006-12-12 21:38:00
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World's Unfunniest Comic Strip Unintentionally Funny


On its own merits there's nothing exceptional about today's "Mallard Fillmore." It's as inert and joke-free as ever. In fact it could be argued that today's strip is substandard--and I realize the absurdity of applying the concept of "standards" to a comic strip that has never shown the slightest interest in such rudiments as humor, character or storytelling. But aside from those reliable absences, today's number is even devoid of the strip's raison d'etre: a smackdown to the liberals. At least last month in another strip about holiday food (fruitcake) creator Bruce Tinsley managed to shoehorn in a reference to a conservative bugaboo (the ACLU). Surely today's riff on packaged eggnog could've included a dig at global warming, Michael Moore or Nancy Pelosi. How hard could it be? It's not like the context matters. I mean it this time: Bruce Tinsley is not even trying.

But then this story hit the wires. And voila! Funniest Fillmore ever.
'Mallard Fillmore' Creator Arrested Again on Alcohol-Related Charges

By E&P Staff

Published: December 12, 2006 10:15 AM ET

NEW YORK Edward Bruce Tinsley, 48, creator of the comic strip Mallard Fillmore -- known for its conservative edge -- was arrested in Columbus, Indiana, on Dec. 4 and charged with operating a vehicle under the influence, the Indianapolis Star reports today. He posted a $755 bond.

It was his second alcohol-related arrest in less that four months, according to the Bartholomew County Sheriff's Department. His previous arrest was Aug. 26.

The comic appear in almost 400 papers in the U.S., including the Star.

Tinsley lives in Columbus. He a blood-alcohol level of 0.14 -- almost twice the level at which an Indiana driver is considered intoxicated.
Editor & Publisher does err when it describes the strip as having a "conservative edge." "Mallard Fillmore" has no edge whatsoever.

Update 10:05 pm: In looking at the strip again it occurs to me that the quotation marks around the word "Holiday" are a reference to the War on Christmas. Well played, Tinsley. But since today's is only one of a series of Mallard's Worst "Holiday" Food strips, my argument that it is substandard still stands.


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[info]crudelydrawn
2006-12-13 02:42 am UTC (link)
Wow. Reading this article marks the first time I've come even close to laughing at something 'Mallard Fillmore'-related.

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[info]mattdoesntcare
2006-12-13 02:44 am UTC (link)
hahaha that duck is wearing a santa hat!

ducks don't wear santa hats!

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[info]robolizard
2006-12-13 04:03 am UTC (link)
And his dislike towards eggnog!? Priceless!

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[info]monica_black
2006-12-13 02:45 am UTC (link)
The fact that it describes it as having an edge made me laugh. *sigh*

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[info]smashingstars
2006-12-13 02:49 am UTC (link)
Ha! It's about nog! It's funnay!

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[info]disturbedgreen
2006-12-13 02:56 am UTC (link)
Clearly this comic is a cry for help, which is going to be ignored much like all of the cries heard from the readers of this comic have been ignored.

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[info]frankenchris
2006-12-13 02:59 am UTC (link)
I'm trying to think of an equally ironic scandal for whoever the hell does Prickly City.

Suggetions?

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[info]modpixie
2006-12-13 02:37 pm UTC (link)
perhaps something involving bestiality...?

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(no subject) - [info]modpixie, 2006-12-13 02:38 pm UTC (Expand)
lol drugs lol
[info]seijiwolf
2006-12-13 03:00 am UTC (link)
I enjoy that the website's URL is "chron.com"

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[info]lovesmasher
2006-12-13 03:25 am UTC (link)
The fruitcake poem is kinda like Andy Rooney in blackface. "You know, fruitcake is kinda like racism. People don't like fruitcake and I don't like black people. I mean, maybe I shouldn't say that about fruitcake on TV because I'm sure someone out there probably likes fruitcake and was offended by that statement. So just in case you were offended by that, I'm sorry I may have offended fruitcake fans by comparing it to black people. I'm just too old now to really be bothered when I offend people, and when I make an apology for doing something that other people say is offensive, I try to put as little meaning behind it as possible. Mammy."

I hate Andy Rooney, blackface, racism and fruitcake, though my reason for hating Andy Rooney is somewhat outdated: He said that it was a good thing that Kurt Kobain killed himself.

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[info]urbaniak
2006-12-13 03:44 am UTC (link)
First of all, there's nothing outdated about hating Andy Rooney because of what he said about Kurt Cobain. I hate him for it to this day. For the record, however, he didn't say it was a good thing that Cobain killed himself, he said his death was not worth crying over. Because, Andy Rooney explained, Kurt Cobain was a big phony. He also explained that although he had never even heard of Cobain until he'd killed himself and knew nothing about him or his work, he knew he was a phony because he saw a photograph of him wearing jeans with holes in the knees. You can look it up.

Yes, Andy Rooney went on national television and after stating that he knew nothing about a man who had just died, proceeded to denounce him. People will be listening to Nirvana a hundred years from now. No one will even know who Andy Rooney was.

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(no subject) - [info]lovesmasher, 2006-12-13 06:15 am UTC (Expand)
(no subject) - (Anonymous), 2006-12-13 07:54 pm UTC (Expand)
(no subject) - [info]jaster, 2006-12-19 06:18 am UTC (Expand)

[info]tfofurn
2006-12-13 03:55 am UTC (link)
Does Mallard Fillmore become tolerable after one has had a great deal of alcohol?

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[info]urbaniak
2006-12-13 04:01 am UTC (link)
No, but I suspect Bruce Tinsley's life does.

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(no subject) - [info]robolizard, 2006-12-13 04:05 am UTC (Expand)

[info]fallingforward
2006-12-13 04:08 am UTC (link)
But.. but... OK, so he did his legwork and got liquored up in preparation... so did the jailers give him his nog???
I need to know! Was his "Holiday" duty fulfilled? Did he jump up and down to mix the booze and egg nog into its proper form?

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[info]fallingforward
2006-12-13 04:16 am UTC (link)
This just in... THE MUGSHOT!
http://www.indystar.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20061212/LOCAL/612120413

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[info]urbaniak
2006-12-13 04:18 am UTC (link)
That's one ornery looking Bush supporter.

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(no subject) - [info]urbaniak, 2006-12-13 04:24 am UTC (Expand)
He's got more range than that - [info]prog, 2006-12-13 04:42 am UTC (Expand)
(no subject) - [info]lovesmasher, 2006-12-13 06:22 am UTC (Expand)
(no subject) - [info]hot_eyeball, 2006-12-13 02:40 pm UTC (Expand)
(no subject) - [info]ultimessence, 2006-12-22 08:06 am UTC (Expand)
Beauty and the Beast - [info]mikemariano, 2006-12-13 05:07 am UTC (Expand)
sweet
[info]ghostgecko
2006-12-13 04:54 am UTC (link)
Yet another republican hoisted by his own petard. Sweet. Personally I'm sick of "comics" about politics. If I want to read about the dumb and horrible stuff happening in the world, I'll read, y'know, the REST of the paper. I make an exception for Tom the Dancing Bug.

Of course, as obnoxious as this is, is it any worse than zombie crap like Family Circus? There was one a few weeks ago where one kid was on the computer saying, "I'm looking something up using Google!". I'm still not sure what the joke was supposed to be.

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[info]deathstar461
2006-12-13 05:03 am UTC (link)
good lord, I hate that comic strip... unintellegent smart-ass humor... ugh....

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[info]right_thinker
2006-12-13 05:42 am UTC (link)
I know that you wrote this just to bait me. Your efforts will fail. You and your liberal friends can continue with your "we're so superior" chat unabated. It's pathetic and disgusting, but that comes as no suprise at this point.

So what if Tinsley was arrested for DUI? So was George W. Bush, and he ended up president. Your liberal blowhardiness is fatuous and repugnant. If one of your team, Ted Rall say, was arrested under similar conditions you would bend over backwards to talk about how he was being railroaded and persecuted by the blah de blah de blah blah blah.

The nice thing about liberals is that they love, love, love to hear themselves talk but fortunately they never get around to actually doing anything, leaving us conservatives to actually, you know, run the country and stuff.

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[info]urbaniak
2006-12-13 06:02 am UTC (link)
An earlier generation of Young Republicans had Al Capp as their standard bearer cartoonist. You have Bruce Tinsley. I feel your pain.

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(no subject) - [info]hot_eyeball, 2006-12-13 02:44 pm UTC (Expand)
(no subject) - [info]lovesmasher, 2006-12-13 04:42 pm UTC (Expand)
(no subject) - [info]lovesmasher, 2006-12-13 06:26 am UTC (Expand)
(no subject) - [info]hot_eyeball, 2006-12-13 02:48 pm UTC (Expand)
(no subject) - [info]lovesmasher, 2006-12-13 03:00 pm UTC (Expand)
(no subject) - [info]hot_eyeball, 2006-12-13 03:05 pm UTC (Expand)
(no subject) - [info]robolizard, 2006-12-14 05:16 am UTC (Expand)
(no subject) - [info]vforventure, 2006-12-13 06:56 am UTC (Expand)
(no subject) - [info]right_thinker, 2006-12-13 06:24 pm UTC (Expand)
(no subject) - [info]gazblow, 2006-12-13 03:19 pm UTC (Expand)
(no subject) - [info]lovesmasher, 2006-12-13 03:52 pm UTC (Expand)
(no subject) - [info]right_thinker, 2006-12-13 06:23 pm UTC (Expand)
(no subject) - [info]fallingforward, 2006-12-13 10:31 pm UTC (Expand)

[info]stainedecho
2006-12-13 06:13 am UTC (link)
Holy shit. I didn't know that the creator of Mallard Fillmore lived in the same town that my grandma does!

Damn, that's like 45 minutes away from me.

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[info]urbaniak
2006-12-13 06:16 am UTC (link)
Drive safely.

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(no subject) - [info]stainedecho, 2006-12-13 02:35 pm UTC (Expand)
(no subject) - [info]never_wakeup, 2006-12-13 03:03 pm UTC (Expand)

[info]vforventure
2006-12-13 06:54 am UTC (link)
Here's the thing though: Is Mallard Fillmore worse than B.C.? Cause I don't think so.

Also, I too hate Andy Rooney. I hate him for the same reason I can't stand most modern art: I can do that. I can scribble on paper, and I can complain about things. And yet, no one gives a crap who I am...

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]lovesmasher
2006-12-13 07:51 am UTC (link)
The thing is, people used to think Andy Rooney was insightful and witty. His wikipedia entry calls him a 'humorist', which to me, means he was funny in the 1940s.

Fame envy though, is a scary thing. Many people would point at Urbaniak there and say 'fie! I could do that!', and Manfred Mann would they be wrong. If you want to see my faulty attempts at voicing cartoons, you're more than welcome to. My youtube account is the same name as this one.

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(no subject) - [info]vforventure, 2006-12-13 10:37 am UTC (Expand)
(no subject) - [info]ghostgecko, 2006-12-13 03:40 pm UTC (Expand)
(no subject) - [info]lovesmasher, 2006-12-13 04:23 pm UTC (Expand)
(no subject) - [info]ghostgecko, 2006-12-13 07:57 pm UTC (Expand)
It gets even better
[info]youngfreud
2006-12-13 11:47 am UTC (link)
Courtesy of the wayback machine at Comics Curmudgeon



A friend wants to propose an e-mail writing campaign to Tinsley where everyone goes, "so, those times you got arrested, did you do like in that one strip? Did it work? It worked, right?"

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Re: It gets even better
[info]mimitabu
2006-12-13 12:18 pm UTC (link)
i don't read comic strips, so i was just sort of taking urbaniak's word for it... but man. no comedic sense at all:(.

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Re: It gets even better - [info]stainedecho, 2006-12-13 02:46 pm UTC (Expand)
Re: It gets even better - [info]lovesmasher, 2006-12-13 03:50 pm UTC (Expand)

[info]sylak
2006-12-14 02:30 am UTC (link)
I hate that fucking duck. So much. So, so much.

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[info]mikeyed
2006-12-14 08:17 am UTC (link)
Woah, Mallard... Millard.

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[info]bastardzero
2006-12-18 11:33 am UTC (link)
There's nothing funnier than a cry for help in just the right context.

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Funniest. Mallard. Fillmore. EVER!
(Anonymous)
2006-12-22 04:58 pm UTC (link)
Image

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Pentagon site was hacked.
(Anonymous)
2007-05-17 12:45 pm UTC (link)
Hack-group called "H0PL" just published video-log :)
http://xblock.info/rss_feed.php?day=05+14+2007&item=3
Cool work!

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I like Mallard Fillmore
(Anonymous)
2008-05-23 08:21 am UTC (link)
I enjoy Mallard Fillmore, and have been reading it for some time now. Of course, with the country so polarized, it's going to annoy @ half the readers; roughly the half who find Trudeau's strip funny. I think both comic strips should be side-by-side on the comic pages, for balance.

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